| My Revuw of Anny Careena by the Countess Leo Tolstoy (485 words) |
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Jack from Missouri (the “Show Me” State) … A Teacher’s Journal. Ferst, I dont like Anny Careena by this Tolstoy guy. I think it sucks the big harey root. Mr. Larsen made us do a revuw of a book so I’m doing it but that doesnt mean I like the book. I dont like reeding. It hurts my head. All these people have wierd names. There parents must have been retarded or something to give them names like “Stupavitch” or what ever. Also what’s a czar? How do you even say czar? Is it like sissors? Or is it like cars? Why can’t these people spell? I dont know. I dont really care. I dont understand any of these people or why its snowing all the time. Do they live in Minesota? I new a girl once who came from Minnasota. She was a skank. I think Anny is a skank too. Or should I say “czank,” hah. (146 words) Anny is married to this old dude. I think he needs Vyagra because hes old and mean. They didn’t have Vyagra I guess in the 70s. Anny is pretty horny and then she meets this guy named Vonty. They hook up behind the old dude’s back and then he gets really pissed. Meanwhile this other guy named Steve likes this girl named Princess. But she likes Vonty so she tells Steve that she just wants to be friends. Steve gets really bummed and decides to cut wheat with peasant people because that’s what you do in Minnsota when a girl tells you to screw yourself. Eventully Anny gets knocked up and all her friends go like “whoa get out of here we can’t hang with you anymore.” Then Vonty rides in the kentucky Derby or something but his horse gets shot in the head while hes running and then they have to put him down in the Kremlin. (304 words) Meanwile Vonty tells Princess that hes not really into her so she gets all emo and makes water in a spa in Germany. After a while Steve and Princess see each other at a big prom in moscow and they start making out. Eventully Anny and Vonty start ragging on each other because the only partys she can go to now are with loosers. After she has a baby she starts doping. Then she gets on a train but she falls overboard and the big wheels keep on turning like they say and her head explodes. Vonty freaks, he goes to Afghanistan with his special forces friends and hopes that he might get lucky and get killed while having duty. Meanwile Steve and Princess get married and have a kid and they all enjoy cutting wheat with the peasant people. (442 words) In conclusion I really intensly aborred this book but it does you teach you good values like learning to get along with devers peasants and not to do dope like Anny does because there’s no good outcome when you fall under a train. My name is Jack, and I’m a teacher in a small town in Missouri—the “Show Me” state…. Donald Gallinger is author of the novel The Master Planets Add this page to your favorite Social Bookmarking websites               
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but, dang!